The Buchan Cowboy. Verse in the Doric.

" I am the Buchan cowboy
They caa me 'Snake-eyed-Joe'
I've rustled coos fae Achnagatt
As far as Tillybo,

I ride the range o Buchan
Wi a sixgun at ma hip
I'd shoot ye like a Swiss cheese
If ye gie ma ony lip.

Ae nicht while drinkin fusky
At the 'Saloon' in the Cyack,
Something hut ma napper
An I fell doon on my back,
There stood Mary-Kate fae Birkies
A peeler on the beat

Her massive haans seen hid me tied
An wupped fae heed tae feet

She dragged me tae the jailhoose
In a peeler's come along
Her fingers up ma nostrils
Michty she wiz strong,

Then tae interrogation
Wi truncheon in her haan
Own up ye snake eyed bastard
Or I'll kill ye faar ye staan!

I teemed masel in terror
An quickly spilled the beans
Tae save masel a thrashin
Fae this angry strushle deem.

Noo I'm on the chyne-gang
For twenty years at least
Ower the heeds o Mary-Kate
An stealin bliddy beasts!"

 

copyright © Patrick Hutchison